It’s really hard to find a date when you are the single parent of assassin babies that always find their way into terrible trouble….
Feeling guilty for being a 14 year old tween version of Nathan:
Listening to ‘Lego House’
By a singer from the Voice
Who I am fawning over
FML
Kids, back in 2012, your aunt Robin wanted to do something more with her life. So she took her love of guns to an organization called S.H.I.E.L.D and fought alongside the Avengers.
Now, your Uncle Barney and I took it pretty hard; she was getting to spend a lot of time with another billionaire playboy, this guy named Tony Stark. Your Uncle Barney almost went crazy when he found out the guy had a metal suit.
“It shoots fireballs, Ted! He looks like a freakin’ storm trooper!”
Then your uncle Barney decided to fight back.
Did everyone else read that whole narration in Bob Saget’s voice?
Oh my god yes. I didn’t realise until I saw your comment but I totally did.
In high school I had this friend who would make me feel bad for getting a better mark in a test or exam than they did.
I stopped sharing with people my marks, even when they asked specifically.
This has carried onto university.
I got some of the best news today and haven’t told anyone.
‘Friend’; good joke.
Do you remember the asbestos? We found it. We found out that it was cheap and it couldn’t catch fire and we went right ahead and built our workplaces and our huts and our holiday cabins out of it. We built our homes out of it. We kept our children inside of it. And James Hardie knew it was poison and they told us it was okay.
And now there is a whole town in Western Australia that has been taken off the map because it is so toxic. There are hundreds of people with cancer, hundreds of people claiming compensation they’ll never get in time, hundreds of people still living inside it. There are people using asbestos as a weapon.
And now they want to drill for Coal Seam Gas in our water supply. They want to go down into the ground and cause an earthquake and pump hundreds of toxic chemicals they can’t take back, like napalm, into the ground on which we live. It is a process we know contaminates water. It is a process that may be behind severe contamination of land and water in the United States; it may be the cause of many animal deaths and cancers and toxins.
I’m supposed to be okay with living in a world that lets that happen simply because the alternative to making fast money and power isn’t in the best profitable interests of companies who are exactly like James Hardie? Exactly like the Tobacco companies who told us it was good to smoke cigarettes.
Companies who have and do and always will lie to us.
And I’m just supposed to sit back and go to work and drink my contaminated water and plant seeds in toxic soil and let my horses feed on contaminated grass and raise my children on dirty power and filthy, unliveable land.
Because apparently we don’t have the guts to pursue a solution we know is possible. We don’t even know the full impacts of what Coal Seam Gas will do to us but we know there is a viable, plausible, renewable, healthy, safe solution and we don’t have the guts to make it happen. I’m meant to support the fact that humans, who have come this far in terms of evolution, don’t have the guts to tune into our survival instincts and save ourselves.
We keep waiting for companies to do it for us.
We’d rather sit back and let ourselves be lied to because it’s a whole lot easier than facing the truth. And it will be the death of us.
“
| — | Oh yeah. (via bookjockey) |
Thank you to Dom for pointing this out to me. This is from a submission to the Australian Senate from Murray McAlpine of the Christian Democrat Party, regarding marriage equality. Not only is this document written in Comic Sans (!!!), but it is full of absurdity. I will…
